posted by penitentman at 8/01/2006 09:23:00 AM
Ok, Ruth, you said you wanted to see some rhymes... you may regret it.
Here's 2, just to show you a sampling as my themes tend to revolve around a... uh... particular type of humor...
The Ace Up My Sleeve
Alone I sit in my private place
My pants around my knees
When at the door I hear a knock
And someone's deadened pleas.
The thing they want is mine for now
The ace that's up my sleeve.
I say that it might be awhile
And they drop down to their knees.
They say that I must hurry now
I say I'll take my time
And that is when I realize
The power is all mine.
So here I sit in my private place
My pants around my knees
I think I'll flush the toilet once
Just to be a tease.
Hairshorts
Today I formed
the grandest plan
ever conceived
by mortal man
For in the summer
I get so hot
I don't want to wear
these clothes I've bought
And in the winter
I get such a chill
(as evidenced by my
'lectricity bill)
I need cover in summer
but it can't be too warm
and extra heat in the winter
to weather the storm
My plan, you see
is just common sense
considering the fact
that my leg hair's so dense
I'll shave off the hair
from my knees to my toes
thus saving myself
from these seasonal woes
In summer I'll run naked
but covered "down there"
with a well tended forest
of curly brown hair
The shavings, I'll use
to line winter clothes
though I will need some help...
perhaps someone who sews
Great things are invented
by men of all sorts
but it took a man of vision
to invent these hair-shorts
click to show or hide the full text of this post
click to post a comment or read comments from:
Ruth,
Fred MacKenzie,
Peter,
PeggySueO,
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Silly Rhymes...
4 Comments:
The Ace Up My Sleeve - What a neat "power" piece! I just had to laugh as my husband used to live in a house with four children, he and his wife, and one bathroom. I would find it hard to exist with two people and one bathroom! I can just see his son sitting there with the girls outside begging for entrance... and flushing "just to be a tease". That is SO Michael.
As an assistant administrator here, David sends me the membership requests to read, so I had the pleasure of reading that piece before you posted it here. An advance giggle so to speak. I'm so glad you gave everyone the opportunity to see it.
Hair Shorts - I like this piece too, but with reservations. I love the cadence of the first stanza. It would be good if the whole piece had the same cadence throughout, but I tried copying it into Word and rewriting it, and could not do it myself throughout the entire piece.
I think there are many unnecessary words which could be cut, however, to bring the whole piece into a better flowing form, such as...
"I need cover in summer
but it can't be too warm
and extra heat in the winter
to weather the storm"
I think that stanza could be dropped completely as you've covered that concept in the previous two stanzas.
If you want to see my complete rewrite of this poem, let me know and I'll email it to you. If you're like me and sometimes don't want other people messing with your work, you can say that too.
I hope some of this may be of use to you.
By
Ruth, at 8/01/2006 04:58:00 PM
I don't care about cadence and all that stuff. They were hilarious! Give me some more:)
By
Fred MacKenzie, at 8/01/2006 07:29:00 PM
very entertaining... that ace up my sleeve should definitely go in the PPTP hall of fame -- I thought that was heading in a completely different direction.
Hair shorts I wasn't as fond of... though that's quite a whacko visual you've dreamed up there... shorts made out of short hairs! I'm cringing just a little.
By
Peter, at 8/02/2006 01:03:00 PM
I thought the first one was very cute!! Didn't really get much out of the second one.
By
PeggySueO, at 8/02/2006 09:45:00 PM
Post a Comment
<< Home