Putting Pen To Paper

Thursday, August 24, 2006

An Ode to Red Bull

posted by Rantirator at 8/24/2006 06:26:00 PM

Ours was a chance meeting, my peachy little sweetheart, do you remember? It was at that chic corner lounge in the warehouse district, oh, so many years ago now. I was draped languidly against the bar with my companion of the moment, and you, my darling, were nestled in your little cooler underneath a soggy bar rail. You were waiting for me, I know it.

I asked the bartender to mix you with vodka, and when he pulled you out and I saw your stylish little outfit – all shiny and metallic blue, I was smitten. Your golden contents sparkled with the refracting light of the disco ball as he poured you, gently, into the glass.

Ahhh, memories. You tasted so refreshing and delighted my senses which had been seriously dulled by my idiotic date. We kissed languorously through the ice and vodka while that other guy swilled whiskey and jabbered with his friends.

The next day, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. My head hurt from the night before and I dragged myself through the morning, wondering when I would meet you next. I went to the hardware store at lunchtime for a pack of paint rollers some Behr interior flat in the shade of “Chianti” and as I approached the checkout counter… what a shock! There you were, sitting in the pop-cooler next to the front door! My heart leapt and I flung the glass door open in excitement. I saved you from the doldrums of association with such bothersome characters as the Mountain Dew and Lipton Brisk, between whom you had been offensively wedged.

I drank you greedily that morning after, but I knew you like it. You loved me too, it was obvious. We didn’t even need that pesky little vodka standing between us… she was too much of a troublemaker the night before anyway.

I knew then that I had you forever. We will always be together now, my darling. I have since found you at the grocery store in four-packs. What luck! I will always keep you near me, both at home and at the office. We will never move to France, my love, or anywhere else where the cold, cruel world has seen fit to ban you. Don’t worry, I will protect you… after all, you give me wingssssssssssss...
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click to post a comment or read comments from: Blogger Rantirator, Blogger joe, Blogger Ruth, Blogger Rantirator,

4 Comments:

  • Hello,

    My name is Connie (aka Rantirator!) and I just learned of this blog recently, and joined today. The piece I posted is an attempt at fun... we'll see how well I did! I like to pick on pop culture whenever possible, especially those elements to which I find myself inexplicably drawn...

    Anywhoo, I am open to any and all comments. Thanks!

    By Blogger Rantirator, at 8/24/2006 06:39:00 PM  

  • Hi Connie.... I just joined here too... hoping its going to be a good place to get honest feedback on writing....

    I enjoyed reading your post.... When I first read the title I must say that I was looking forward to less than I got... (I said to myself rather negativly... "Ode to Red Bull?...rite!)but I was pleasantly surprised.... you drew me right in.... my first reaction was trying to determine who was narrating... at first I pictured the sterotype gay guy (probably due to the words "peachy" and "chic" and "wharehouse district" and "languidly" and that you refer to your date initially as "companion"...

    All in all I enjoyed reading your work....your settings are very descriptive and your dialogue fits the character nicely

    I don't know who has the advertising contract for Red Bull but if I were you I would find out and see if they take submissions ... I think this would make a good commercial for Red Bull.

    Lookin forward to more of your work.

    mt

    By Blogger joe, at 8/25/2006 05:47:00 AM  

  • Well now Connie, this was an amusing read and one which kept me interested all the way through. Like Michael, I was a bit gender confused by thinking the first time through that Rantirator (I assumed the narrator here)must surely be a male pseudonym. Now, even at my age, I find I can be surprised.

    I should have seen the clues to femininity such as "draped languidly" (yes, that could also indicate gayness Michael), and the feminine notice of the "stylish little outfit". But that "stylish little outfit" also seems to indicate that the drink is feminine and thus making the drinker male (or not... given the gayness possibilities).

    Then "she" went shopping for paint rollers which is a male thing! And complained about the pesky vodka standing between them as "she was too much of a troublemaker", which sounds to me like "he's" referring to another woman coming between him and his female companion.

    But, I think the gender confusion adds to the piece. Males or females can read it and see it however they want. It works for both. I agree with Michael... It would make a CUTE commercial!

    By Blogger Ruth, at 8/25/2006 06:40:00 AM  

  • Thanks for the comments! The potential for gender confusion never even occurred to me... this is why it's so wonderful to hear from others! (And for the record, I am a young woman, with LOTS of gay friends, and I have the stereotypically masculine profession of rehabbing distressed properties. So I guess maybe that explains it?)

    By Blogger Rantirator, at 8/29/2006 02:17:00 PM  

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